I read the first chapter of the book of Deuteronomy the other day, where Moses reminded the Children of Israel of how bad they messed stuff up (insert eye roll). As I went on reading, I made it to verse 29, he said, “Then I said to you, ‘Do not be terrified, or afraid of them. The Lord your God, who goes before you, He will fight for you, according to all he did for you in Egypt before your eyes, and in the wilderness where you saw how the Lord your God carried you, as a man carries his son, in all the way that you went until you came to this place.” (Deuteronomy 1:29-31, NKJV). Now, the next verse, thirty-two, goes on to say that the Children of Israel didn’t believe God. SMH. The God that gave them land and guided them as a cloud by day and fire by night. They didn’t believe the God that delivered them from slavery and provided for them. They didn’t believe that God could deliver this land into their hands. I mean, obviously they didn’t, because they refused to go get it.
Now, I was already fired up, but I kept reading until I got to verse thirty-four… the one where God was angry. And with good reason too! I mean, He gave them that land. He basically said, “Look y’all, go and fight, but it’s fixed and I’m gonna cause you to win, no matter what. Don’t worry about their size or what they have.” But they refused to go, so God was like, “You know what? Don’t even worry about it. But know this, none of your generation will make it to see this land that I promised. Go ahead and wander!” Well then, in verse 41, after God declared that none of them would make it in, they felt all bad and got all nervous, and wanted to go fight. “Then you answered and said to me, ‘we have sinned against the Lord; we will go up and fight, just as the Lord our God commanded us.’ And when everyone had girded on his weapons of war, you were ready to go up into the mountain.” (Deuteronomy 1:41, NKJV).
Yep, they decided they wanted to apologize and go fight when they got ready, when they felt the heat. All of a sudden, their confidence was in God, but God wasn’t having it. “And the Lord said to me, ‘Tell them, “Do not go up nor fight, for I am not among you; lest you be defeated before your enemies.” (Deuteronomy 1:42, NKJV). But you know what? They went anyway! Even after God, Himself, told them that He wasn’t going with them, they had the nerve to go anyway. I guess they thought He was playin. And those Amorites chased them away, “as bees do” (verse 44). And at this point, I got disgusted with those Israelites. I sure did! I’m sitting on my bed reading and thinking, “How??? How they think they gonna just not trust God and win??? Huh??? HOW??? (cause sometimes, when I’m hype, I don’t think in perfect grammar… forgive me). They chose not to trust Him after He told them that He was giving this land and they didn’t have to worry. Then He got angry and then they wanted to go all up in there confidently after He said He wasn’t going. **Eye roll**
That’s when, it hit me! What??? Well, the point of this post, of course…
I was one of the Children of Israel. Yep… it was me! How??? Well, thanks for asking. You see, there are many things that God has privileged me to do. I’m doing so much that listing everything would take up too much of your time, but I’m called to do it and it’s an honor. My point for telling you that was to say, I could have been further along before now. No, this isn’t a post about regrets, but about obedience. This season isn’t the first time that God has told me to “go take the land.” 2017 isn’t the beginning of God telling me
God wasn’t pleased, so I went through a period when I had no idea who I was. Why?