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That Thing Called Purpose…..

Well…it’s been a while.  I don’t generally publicize my online thought process…a.k.a. blog so I don’t think anyone missed me.

Anyhoo…I’ve recently been on a journey.  No, I didn’t leave the country, state, or even the city…but I left my comfort zone.  If you know me then you know I like being where I like to be. 

*shrugs* We often get to a place where we become so comfortable where we are that we become numb to the signals showing us where we actually need to be.  I worked the same job for 4.5 years.  I was the office manager at a childcare center.  I was in charge of billing, accounts receivable, and field trip and event planning.  That’s pretty good…or so I thought.  Now, being at the same job for a number of years is not a bad thing, I’m not saying that at all.  What I am saying is that being at a place when you should be somewhere else is dangerous.

Well, after 4.5 years, in March of 2013, I decided, (well not really me…Jesus decided it for me…I mean who just leaves their job after that long voluntarily without going somewhere seemingly better?!?  That’s all I’m sayin….) to leave my job.  I was going back to school to work in the health and fitness field…or so I thought…okay, okay, I decided that part on my own…BAD IDEA.  I’ve noticed that when I come up with my own bright ideas, they NEVER work out.

Anyhoo…I started working as a part time barista at Starbucks.  How the heck I was going to live off the wages of a part time employee?  I didn’t know but I had a lesson to learn.  I was the type that had to have everything under control.  I would worry and stress about things before they even came up.  Even though I made more than enough money working my full time job, I would still stress about how and what would get taken care of.  I’m getting uptight just thinking of how nuts I was.  I had to learn to trust God, lean on Him, be with Him, talk to Him………..

For eight months, I worked this part time job.  Now, I’m saved, I live a life of what I hope is pleasing to God and I feel like I “love” everyone.  Well, I learned that I loved everyone but on my own terms…at a distance…from far off…with a smile and a wave. 

  Along with those lessons I had to learn…God placed me in Love Right 101.  I came in contact with all kinds of people, at first I would just be the typical customer service employee.  “Hi, how are you?”  “Have a nice day!”  After a while, lots of extra time with God, prayer, word, I began to genuinely care about these people that I saw everyday.  You know, those regular customers that came in and ordered the EXACT SAME drink about 3 times a day?!  I got to know them and their stories as well as the other baristas that I worked with.  I began to “love” these people.  I began to care about how they were doing and how I could make their day better.  I began to teach them that things could work out even though they seemed hopeless.  I began to get close enough to them where I could influence their atmosphere.  I was in the position to exchange their negative for my positive.  They became family!

Almost as soon as I began to learn this lesson, things in my life started to go crazy.  I couldn’t quite pay my bills, car note past due, rent late maybe facing eviction, lights shut off, food scarce. But as I began to focus on others, I realized that I never stressed about my own situation.  I would talk to God but not just about my problems, I began to just thank Him and talk to Him because I wanted to.  Because I needed to be close to Him, because I wanted to be close to Him.  I finally learned to trust Him!!!  I’d finally learned to serve others.

What does this have to do with purpose?!?  Well, ha, glad you asked!!!  Once I stopped focusing on me and what I needed and wanted and began to communicate with God, and love those around me genuinely and not just because I was taught it was right, I began to realize my purpose.  I was finally still and quiet enough to pay attention to what I REALLY wanted and what I was really meant to do.  Something I had never done.  I was always so busy that I couldn’t think straight enough to know my own destiny.  Dangerous place to be and I didn’t even realize it.  My problem wasn’t my job but what I was doing there.  So, not my location but my position was all wrong.  It was like being on the pitchers mound with the stance of an shortstop.  Yeah…I know you frowned at that…but that’s exactly what I was doing.

I am now working at the Childcare center that I previously worked at for 4.5 years but I am now fulfilling my destiny and doing what I love to do…I teach children.  The thing about me teaching is that I’ve worked around children over half my life.  I worked at an elementary school during college while getting my business degree.  Everyone has always told me that I should just teach.  Well that wasn’t good enough for me.  I was constantly chasing a “greater purpose”…really one that wasn’t mine to have.  Translation…I was running.  I had to learn that that blocks blessings and greatness that is your life. The thing about purpose is that you can never really get away from it. It will always find you but it’s up to you what conditions it finds you under.

Since I begin doing what I was purposed to do, I have had many great opportunities present themselves.  Ones that I know were sent by God and designed specifically for me.  I also learned that I couldn’t have possibly been here before because I wasn’t mature enough to be here.  I wasn’t ready to get off on that exit yet.  Now that I’m here, I can’t and I won’t ever consider going back. I was made for this…the chosen have no choice!

Just be GREAT!

Ms. A.M.White

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