top of page

Withdrawal Symptoms

We always talk about moving on…leaving without notice…walking away from toxic relationships and circumstances, but we never talk about the memories that are still left behind.  No, I’m not telling you to sit and remember those times, and I am definitely not telling you to hol

d on to anything that you are trying so desperately hard to let go of.  But what I am saying is that we always tell each other to let go, but we never tell each other that it’s okay and normal not to know how.  “Girl…forget him! He ain’t no good!”, “You know you need to just forget about it…it’s in the past…let it go!”, “They were never for you anyway.  Just let them go!”

Yeah…that’s cool…and it’s NECESSARY.  But…’s NOT easy.  We. Are. Humans!  We. Have. Regrets!  We. Don’t Like. Letting. Go!  And that is normal.  So, let me tell you that it is perfectly normal to go through withdrawal symptoms.  I want you to decide NOW to stop beating yourself up about that thought you had of “going back”.  I’ve had more than enough times when I have sat and remembered the “good ‘ol days” and wished things could just go back to those times.  I have definitely had times when I just wanted to go have a girls night with that old bestie and forget that we ever “unfriended” each other.  Sure, I have moments now when I just wanna go “do lunch” or get back to that “better paying job” even though I know it was time for me to go.  Yes, I have had plenty of “ping of ice cream and cry” nights that I’ve wanted what I had.  But, you know what???, it’s not expedient.  It’s not for me anymore.  What once was mine, in some instances, is no longer mine.  There’s a saying that goes, “what’s for me is for me.”  Well, you know what else?  What’s not for you is just as much NOT  for you as what is yours, belongs to you! (Did I confuse you?  Cause I almost confused myself with that one.  Lol!)  Let’s “look to Jesus” on this one…….Isaiah 43:18 says “Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old.”  In verse 19, it goes on to say, “Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.”  In the New Living Translation, verse 19 reads, “For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.”  That tells me, ” you know what Alecia, STOP dwelling on what WAS and focus on what IS!”

Sometimes, memories can be like a drug.  We keep “using” them  and “taking hits” to make us feel good about where we were and what we had; though sometimes, where we were wasn’t the most ideal situation.  We often have a way of blocking out the negative aspects of the past because we get lonely or stagnate and discouraged with where we are presently.  Those memories, somehow, seem to make the past or that old friend or flame not seem so bad.  Many times, this is how we get tricked and trapped into going back, or sulking in the misery of “shoulda, coulda, wouldas”.  STOP THAT!  We’ve gotta learn that, even with “withdrawal symptoms”, eventually, things get better.  It’s like that 1am craving for tacos and cupcakes (only me….mmmmkay), if you just take yourself to sleep, it’ll pass and you won’t have the regrets and gym beat down later that day.  The New Living Translation of the Bible says in Hebrews 12:1, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up.  And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.”  Our past, and memories of our past, slows us down.  It causes us to keep looking back when we should be looking forward.  Just like withdrawals from drugs and alcohol keep you going back into that cave of destruction.  So, I’ll say it to you, “STOP dwelling on what WAS and focus on what IS!”

God loves us so much that He not only told us to let go, but He made a way for us to escape the guilt and temptation to go back.  “The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience.  And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.” 1 Corinthians 10:13 (NLT)  There is always comfort in those moments and always a “back door” to set you free from those tempting times.  So, please, don’t give in to those withdrawals.  Your future is worth so much more than that sadness you’re feeling in the moment.  It’s worth so much more than that phone call you are contemplating making.  YOUR sanity is worth so much more than that text you want to answer so badly.  YOUR promise is worth MUCH MORE than that lunch date or movie and free dinner.  The purpose within you is greater than the envy you feel as you watch “them” move on without you.  The destiny before you is so much BIGGER than that crowd you miss rolling with.

Withdrawal symptoms come and go but God’s peace is bigger than your mind can comprehend and His plan for you is worth all the letting go.  God’s promises to you will make the pain you’ve felt from this “separation anxiety” seem to dissipate.  So, “Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.” Psalms 37:4  That means all the stuff you REALLY WANT…those desires and longings…when you allow your life to align with the Word of God, He’ll give them all to you.

Be encouraged…..please don’t give in…..please don’t go back….PLEASE!!!

Love y’all,

Ms. A.M.White

2 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page